The holidays are supposed to be a time of happiness and joy spent with close friends and family.  However for many of us Thanksgiving and Christmas can be a time of isolation and sadness.  As someone who has lost both parents, the holidays are a painful reminder that they are no longer around. 

When I attend family events with my extended family it’s an in the face reminder that my mom and dad are gone.  This causes feelings of anger, resentment, and jealousy when I see my cousins spending time and creating new memories with their parents which I will never be able to do again. My wife visits with her parents during the holidays and my kids always enjoy this special time with their grandparents. 

It makes me sad that they will never be able to enjoy these moments with my parents. I know all too well the feelings and emotions that the holidays can stir up and the potential sadness and depression. 

You are not alone if you feel blue during this time of the year. 38% of people surveyed said their stress increased  during the holidays. 

Here are some tips I have used to help during the holidays.

Tips For Fighting Holiday Blues and Depression

Avoid Drinking Too Much

Alcohol seems to be everywhere you turn during the holidays.  But if you are prone to feeling sad during the holidays try to avoid excessive alcohol drinking as much as possible.  When I was feeling blue before Christmas I would take a couple of shots of bourbon, fill a Yeti tumbler with wine and take my dog for a long walk at night.  I would feel better for a short amount of time but then next day I would feel like crap and sadder than ever.  Trust me drinking is never a long-term solution.

Get Some Exercise

Want to feel better?  Get to the gym and get in a good workout.  Release some endorphins while also burning off some well needed calories. Even if it’s a short walk try to get some physical activity.  You will be surprised at how much better this will make you feel.

Treat Yourself

Get yourself a Christmas gift!  Been wanting that latest electronic gadget, video game, or sweater?  Go ahead and treat yourself!  Just make sure your finances are in order before you do this. You could also go see that movie you’ve been wanting to see or play your favorite video game.

Many years the best gift I get during the holidays is from myself!  Ha Ha!  I even wrap it and put it under the tree!

Listen to Your Favorite Holiday Music

It’s amazing how much music can lift your mood.  Some of your favorite Christmas music from your childhood may be just what you need to feel better. The nostalgia and the pleasant memories it invokes can warm your troubled soul.  Here’s one of my favorites from Gene Autry.  It’s funny because it’s from the 1950’s (way before my time) but it was one of the first albums my parents gave me when I was a kid.

Start a New Tradition

Thanksgiving was especially difficult for me after my parents passed away.  So I made it a tradition to go to a Cowboys football game to take my mind off of things.  For the last several years I’ve worked a job that is extremely busy on Thanksgiving so that has helped as well.

Volunteer

If you feel isolated and alone during this time of the year try volunteering.  Not only will this give you an opportunity to meet new people you will also be helping someone in need.  I’ve volunteered at the local food pantry and at church handing out turkeys and Thanksgiving dinner to those who needed it.

Cry it Out

It’s OK to feel sad.  Cry it out.  You will feel cleansed and much better.  Crying can bring about a sense of relief and releases stress hormones.

Get Some Sleep

Give your body some well needed rest by taking a nap and try to get 7-8 hours of sleep each night.  You will might be surprised to see how much better you will feel when you are clear headed and well rested.

Get Help

If you are sad for prolonged periods of time you might need professional help.  This is nothing to be ashamed of. Your mental health needs to be treated as seriously as your physical health.

If you are feeling suicidal you should immediately do one of these:

• Call 911
• Go to the emergency room
• Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).

Hopefully these tips will help you get past the holiday blues.  Remember to live in the present and that this too shall pass.  Before you know it the holidays will be in the rear view mirror so try to enjoy what you can, go easy on yourself.  Good luck!